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๐Ÿงฎ Calculator

Social Battery Calculator

A serious-looking calculator that calmly tells you the truth about your internet usage.

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Your social battery calculator

Move the sliders. Watch the number go. Feel the diagnosis.

Then send it to someone who needs to see it.

How this calculator works

Move the 2 sliders and the result updates instantly โ€” there is nothing to submit and no account needed.

What you are setting

  • Interactions โ€” anywhere from 0 to 20.
  • Intro โ€” anywhere from 0 to 10.

What your score means

  • Stable (0โ€“25%) โ€” You log off occasionally. Touch grass champion.
  • Mid (25โ€“60%) โ€” You are average online. Some recovery still possible.
  • Concerning (60โ€“90%) โ€” Your dopamine receptors are in witness protection.
  • Terminal (90% and above) โ€” Schedule a grass-touching intervention with a friend.

This is a for-fun calculator, not a diagnostic tool. The number is only as serious as the inputs you give it.

Common questions

Do I need to submit anything?

No. The result recalculates as you move the sliders, and nothing is sent anywhere or stored.

What are the possible results?

There are 4 bands: Stable, Mid, Concerning, Terminal. Which one you land in depends on the total the sliders produce.

Is it accurate?

It is a fun calculator, not a clinical one. The maths is simple and consistent, but the inputs are self-reported, so treat the number as entertainment.

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